Dear Tom Brady,
As a die-hard New England Patriots fan, I implore you to rethink your choice to appear on the cover of EA Sports Madden NFL 18. Please know, I am pondering broadly about this request. I solely need what’s finest for you, your loved ones, the Patriots and the hundreds of thousands of women and men in the Boston space who neglect they’re absolutely grown grownup human beings most Sundays between the first kickoff in September and the ultimate seconds in December.
I perceive it have to be a one-of-a-kind honor to grace the cover of one of America’s favourite video video games, significantly when the makers dubbed the coming season’s installment its “G.O.A.T. Edition.” Sure, Mark Wahlberg referred to as you the “best evah” after you and the Pats beat the Seattle Seahawks in Super Bowl XLIX, however one way or the other this simply feels a bit extra official.
I am unsure why. It simply does.
There are rather a lot of sensible causes too. A online game cover, like cover, is an effective option to reinforce your individual private model. It enhances your cachet. That’s a wise option to hold your eye on the future. Someday you will not be enjoying soccer, although I hope that day is a protracted, very long time from now.
I am guessing you want the thought of following your teammate Rob Gronkowski, who was on the cover final yr. You guys appear shut. Sure, Gronk’s a tricky act to comply with, but when anybody can do it, you possibly can.
Still, does not Gronk’s expertise offer you pause? He was on the cover, then he bought injured and missed a bunch of the season. He did not even play in the Patriots spectacular comeback towards the Atlanta Falcons in the Super Bowl.
He’s not the just one. Previous cover stars — Michael Vick (injured earlier than the season began) and Donovan McNabb (out at the halfway mark), simply to call two — have stumbled after being named.
It’s referred to as the Madden Curse.
“I’m not one to believe in curses, so I’m ready to take the challenge head-on like always!” you mentioned in EA’s press release, “It doesn’t stand a chance!!!”
I like the triple exclamation marks. They converse to your depth. But your phrasing worries me. It virtually acknowledges the Curse’s existence.
Correlation is not causation. Sometimes, like when Troy Polamalu was on the cover after which performed solely 5 video games, it is simply coincidence. Sure, Vegas may take bets on the Curse, however Vegas is opportunistic, not scientific.
You know who’s scientific? The 21 professors who submitted a courtroom temporary saying chilly climate in Foxboro, Massachusetts, was the trigger of deflated footballs whenever you beat the Indianapolis Colts in January 2015. (Locals spell it F-O-X-B-O-R-O. Get over it.)
Still, I can not assist however take into consideration players who suffered the Curse after getting their shot at the cover. Marshall Faulk could not break 1,000 yards, which he had in every of the earlier 5 seasons; Peyton Hillis did not crack 600 yards.
As I sit right here sporting a Pats T-shirt and a Pats hat and typing in entrance of a Pats pennant, I’ve all of the sudden gotten superstitious. I wish to see the New England win one other Super Bowl. I would like one other Lombardi Trophy flown to Boston. I wish to see you and the group on the Duck Boats in winter.
So please, Tom Brady, hand over the cover.
Maybe Eli Manning will take it.
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